I heard about this on News 12 this morning. I suspect that the dog could be my sister, Fanny. Fanny loves coffee. She loves apple martinis, too, but that's another post.
Thursday, November 20, 2008
Tuesday, November 18, 2008
Mutts Rule
Fred is very excited by the prospect of a new dog in the White House this January. Like many others, he suggests that the Obama family consider a noble mutt. We make the best dogs!Perhaps the Obamas could visit Fred's hometown of Pup Washington to make their selection!
Friday, October 31, 2008
Fred Says "Boo"
Last Saturday, our mamas made me and Fanny dress up in silly costumes and walk in the 2nd Annual Unleashed Halloween Pet Parade. Really, it should be called a Dog Parade. It's not as though any cats or gerbils participated.Anyway, Fanny picked out an angel costume. I had trouble figuring out what I wanted to be, so Mama Lizo picked out this kinda dorky ladybug costume for me, complete with feelers that velcroed (TM) around my head. Mama Carol said, "That costume is a dress. It's for a girl," but Mama Lizo put it on me anyway.
We did have a slight problem. The costume was a bit big for me, so my wee wee ended up inside the costume. When I did my ceremonial pee-on-a-tree, the pee came out the front! I was so embarassed.
We didn't win any prizes, either. Mama Lizo says that if you have more than one dog, the key is to dress with a theme. You know, like one of us could be peanute butter and the other could be jelly. I call PB!
Sunday, October 19, 2008
Killer Duboff
According to the terms of our contract, Fanny and I are entitled to at least three walks per day, sometimes more. We have, at minimum, the Morning Constitutional and Neighborhood Sniff, the Afternoon Pull 'n' Poo, and the Evening Stargazing Pee.
On Saturday, Mama Lizo agreed to take us for the early morning walk, mostly 'cause Mama Carol shamed her into it. As we ambled down the front stoop (which is on the side, but whatever), Fanny spied a tiny black froo froo dog in a sweater sniffing near our house.
She ran after the tiny dog.
According to the dog's owner, she bit the stupid little thing.
Mama Lizo was very apologetic and told the froo froo dog's froo froo owner to come see her if there are any vet bills. I tried to make friends with the little furry thing, but it bared its teeth at me.
Fred just wants to be friends.
On Saturday, Mama Lizo agreed to take us for the early morning walk, mostly 'cause Mama Carol shamed her into it. As we ambled down the front stoop (which is on the side, but whatever), Fanny spied a tiny black froo froo dog in a sweater sniffing near our house.
She ran after the tiny dog.
According to the dog's owner, she bit the stupid little thing.
Mama Lizo was very apologetic and told the froo froo dog's froo froo owner to come see her if there are any vet bills. I tried to make friends with the little furry thing, but it bared its teeth at me.
Fred just wants to be friends.
Tuesday, May 20, 2008
Fred is Feeling Better
As many of you may know, I had an ear infection. I went to see Dr. Sheila and now I am feeling oh so much better!
Monday, March 31, 2008
Fred has a play mat
Umm, I know it's been a while.
I've been busy. I have a play mat now. My mommies got it for me at Home Depot.
I will post a picture once I figure out how to press the button with my paw.
Love,
Fred
I've been busy. I have a play mat now. My mommies got it for me at Home Depot.
I will post a picture once I figure out how to press the button with my paw.
Love,
Fred
Thursday, December 13, 2007
Fred Hearts Snow
Ah, snow! Fred loves it. The feeling of snow under his sturdy paws, the sweet sensation of cool flakes falling on his little pink tongue and floppy ears....
For some reason, Mama Lizo doesn't seem to enjoy the snow as much as Fred does. Though it does make it easier to find and scoop up Fred's poo.
Time for Fred's hot chocolate!
Stay warm,
Freddyboy
For some reason, Mama Lizo doesn't seem to enjoy the snow as much as Fred does. Though it does make it easier to find and scoop up Fred's poo.
Time for Fred's hot chocolate!
Stay warm,
Freddyboy
Wednesday, December 12, 2007
Fred is Going Grassroots
If you know Fred, you know that Fred loves him some Oreo Cakesters. And baby carrots. And microwaved 94% fat free popcorn.But mostly Oreo Cakesters, and that's what this new, grassroots movement is about. If you are a fan of the Oreo Cakester, Fred would like to encourage you to contact Nabisco and ask them to feed our habit with two new versions:
1) the vanilla cake / vanilla creme Cakester
2) the vanilla cake / chocolate creme Cakester.
Here is a link to Nabisco's FAQ and comment form.
Many thanks to Pascale for locating that vital information on the World Wide Woof.
I would send Nabisco a message right now, but my paws and mouth are full of cakey goodness.
Love and Cakesters,
Fred
Monday, December 10, 2007
Fred is Improving His Literacy Skills!
Fred is so excited to inform you that according to the Blog Readability Test, Fred's blog is written on a Junior High level.Mama Lizo's blog is on a college (postgrad) level, but she's a nerd.
Love,
Fred
Friday, December 07, 2007
Fred is A-Okay
A concerned Fredfan wrote to my mommy to ask if I had been de-barked or something. She was worried because it has been so long since my last post.
I am fine, fredfans. I have just been busy with my many projects and activities, including high-fashion modeling, snowboarding, chewing my paws and napping.
I will try to write more in the future. Even when I don't, fredfans, please know that I am always thinking of you.
Woof,
Fred
PS: A few comments wouldn't hurt, either. Fred has feelings too, you know.
I am fine, fredfans. I have just been busy with my many projects and activities, including high-fashion modeling, snowboarding, chewing my paws and napping.
I will try to write more in the future. Even when I don't, fredfans, please know that I am always thinking of you.
Woof,
Fred
PS: A few comments wouldn't hurt, either. Fred has feelings too, you know.
Monday, October 22, 2007
Fred is Feeling Harassed
Mama Lizo and Mama Carol have received several notes from our downstairs neighbors. Here is Mama Lizo's response. She has not shared it with them, but writing it made her feel much better.
------------------------------------------------
Dear Downstairs Neighbors,
Thank you for your constructive criticism.
As you know, we have attempted to address your concerns by carpeting our apartment and not wearing shoes while we are in our home. Based on your valuable input, we have decided to make some additional improvements, as follows.
The stairway, which is carpeted, is currently our only means of access in and out of our apartment. Apparently, the fact that we occassionally request access to the apartment that we pay to rent (Yes! We do indeed pay lots of rent!) is an issue for you. To address this concern, we plan to enter and exit via the windows instead. A contractor will be by shortly to install a system of pulleys and a large bucket for this purpose. We will of course contact you before entering or leaving to request permission. We will also speak with you before we cook, watch TV, shower, flush the toilet, open a drawer, turn on a light, or any other action that might disturb you.
We understand that the dogs make some noise when they enter and leave the apartment as well. Currently, we either leash the dogs upstairs or let them out unleashed and then harness them up outside. Apparently, neither option is working to your satisfaction. Effective immediately, we will instruct the dogs to relieve themselves in the apartment.
To address other concerns you have about the dogs (ie, occassional barking and tail wagging), we plan to have them de-barked and de-tailed. If the ASPCA complains, we will explain that we really had no choice in the matter.
We have also requested special permission from our employers to start work late and leave early so that we will not disturb you. We trust that our employers - a non-profit serving all public libraries in the County and a nationwide property management firm - will understand and grant this request. No more early-morning, late-night, or weekend meetings for us - thanks! We will also submit requests to you before scheduling our business trips.
In return, we expect that we will no longer be subjected to your loud, whiney voices (did you know that we can hear all of your conversations?), constant door-slamming, and furniture moving. Would you consider carpeting your ceiling to cut down on the noise? It might also help if you covered all of your walls in cork and communicated via American Sign Language. In addition, as we are having the dogs de-barked, we request that you have your baby's voice box removed so we will not have to hear her cry. Perhaps our vet can work out a 2 for 1 special.
Again, thank you for pointing out the errors of our ways. Before your last note, we had no idea that we had people living below us! We are also aware that you moved to Port Washington from Manhattan and we are sure that the high noise level here must be difficult for you to bear.
Sincerely,
Your Upstairs Neighbors : )
------------------------------------------------
Dear Downstairs Neighbors,
Thank you for your constructive criticism.
As you know, we have attempted to address your concerns by carpeting our apartment and not wearing shoes while we are in our home. Based on your valuable input, we have decided to make some additional improvements, as follows.
The stairway, which is carpeted, is currently our only means of access in and out of our apartment. Apparently, the fact that we occassionally request access to the apartment that we pay to rent (Yes! We do indeed pay lots of rent!) is an issue for you. To address this concern, we plan to enter and exit via the windows instead. A contractor will be by shortly to install a system of pulleys and a large bucket for this purpose. We will of course contact you before entering or leaving to request permission. We will also speak with you before we cook, watch TV, shower, flush the toilet, open a drawer, turn on a light, or any other action that might disturb you.
We understand that the dogs make some noise when they enter and leave the apartment as well. Currently, we either leash the dogs upstairs or let them out unleashed and then harness them up outside. Apparently, neither option is working to your satisfaction. Effective immediately, we will instruct the dogs to relieve themselves in the apartment.
To address other concerns you have about the dogs (ie, occassional barking and tail wagging), we plan to have them de-barked and de-tailed. If the ASPCA complains, we will explain that we really had no choice in the matter.
We have also requested special permission from our employers to start work late and leave early so that we will not disturb you. We trust that our employers - a non-profit serving all public libraries in the County and a nationwide property management firm - will understand and grant this request. No more early-morning, late-night, or weekend meetings for us - thanks! We will also submit requests to you before scheduling our business trips.
In return, we expect that we will no longer be subjected to your loud, whiney voices (did you know that we can hear all of your conversations?), constant door-slamming, and furniture moving. Would you consider carpeting your ceiling to cut down on the noise? It might also help if you covered all of your walls in cork and communicated via American Sign Language. In addition, as we are having the dogs de-barked, we request that you have your baby's voice box removed so we will not have to hear her cry. Perhaps our vet can work out a 2 for 1 special.
Again, thank you for pointing out the errors of our ways. Before your last note, we had no idea that we had people living below us! We are also aware that you moved to Port Washington from Manhattan and we are sure that the high noise level here must be difficult for you to bear.
Sincerely,
Your Upstairs Neighbors : )
Friday, October 05, 2007
Fred Reviews Books
A certain head of reference gifted my mommies with a copy of Barkitecture. I must say that it looks awfully yummy - Fred loves to gnaw on coated stock.
It is also just the book for a stylish dog like Fred, the dog who yearns to lounge in a doghouse designed by Frank Lloyd Wright (really!) or The Muttropolitan Opera House. Did you know that Marie Antoinette had a sumptious niche a chien at Versailles? Just a hint, mommies!
Next on Fred's reading list: How to Raise a Jewish Dog.
It is also just the book for a stylish dog like Fred, the dog who yearns to lounge in a doghouse designed by Frank Lloyd Wright (really!) or The Muttropolitan Opera House. Did you know that Marie Antoinette had a sumptious niche a chien at Versailles? Just a hint, mommies!
Next on Fred's reading list: How to Raise a Jewish Dog.
Tuesday, September 18, 2007
Public Service Announcement from Newsday and Fred
SYOSSET: Free vaccinations for pets Saturday
BILL MASON
September 12, 2007
Nassau residents can get free rabies vaccinations for their pets Saturday at the Oyster Bay Animal Shelter in Syosset, the county Health Department said.The vaccinations for dogs, cats and ferrets are offered from 10 a.m. to 4 p.m. at the shelter, 150 Miller Place, Syosset. The law requires dogs, cats and ferrets to be immunized against rabies.
"With 66 rabid raccoons found to date in Nassau County since 2004 ... it is more important than ever to immunize your pets," a department statement said.
For more information, go to the county Web site at www.nassaucountyny.gov/agencies/health/ or call 516-571-2290, or the state Health Department's site at www.health.state.ny.us/diseases/communicable/zoonoses/rabies or call 518-474-3186.
Copyright © 2007, Newsday Inc.
BILL MASON
September 12, 2007
Nassau residents can get free rabies vaccinations for their pets Saturday at the Oyster Bay Animal Shelter in Syosset, the county Health Department said.The vaccinations for dogs, cats and ferrets are offered from 10 a.m. to 4 p.m. at the shelter, 150 Miller Place, Syosset. The law requires dogs, cats and ferrets to be immunized against rabies.
"With 66 rabid raccoons found to date in Nassau County since 2004 ... it is more important than ever to immunize your pets," a department statement said.
For more information, go to the county Web site at www.nassaucountyny.gov/agencies/health/ or call 516-571-2290, or the state Health Department's site at www.health.state.ny.us/diseases/communicable/zoonoses/rabies or call 518-474-3186.
Copyright © 2007, Newsday Inc.
Monday, September 17, 2007
Wednesday, September 05, 2007
It's Late for Fred to Be Up
Fred isn't usually up this late, but Mama Lizo had a big meeting tonight for work and he really wanted to say hey to her before she (and he) went to sleep. I love the way Mama Lizo spends time with me each evening, stroking my silky ears and calling me her Handsome Boy while we watch reruns of General Hospital or she reads to me.
Mama Carol thinks this is weird.
Zzzzz,
Fred
Mama Carol thinks this is weird.
Zzzzz,
Fred
Wednesday, August 29, 2007
Tuesday, August 28, 2007
The Many Names of Fred
Full Legal Name: Frederick Carter Duboff
Hebrew Name: Eitan Chaim ("strong" and "life")
Backwards Name to Which I Respond Anyway: Derf
Yiddish Name: Derfeleh
Bedroom Name: Mr. Cuddles
Royal Name: Maria Fredericka
Superhero Name: Captain Confused
Don't Ask: Princess Fred
Stripper Name: Candi
Hebrew Name: Eitan Chaim ("strong" and "life")
Backwards Name to Which I Respond Anyway: Derf
Yiddish Name: Derfeleh
Bedroom Name: Mr. Cuddles
Royal Name: Maria Fredericka
Superhero Name: Captain Confused
Don't Ask: Princess Fred
Stripper Name: Candi
Friday, July 27, 2007
A Day in the Life of Fanny
Hello, this is guest blogger Fanny Duboff. Fred blogged about his day yesterday and many people have asked to learn more about my exciting life. How could I disappoint my many fans? Here you go, darlings:
6 am: Awaken from Beauty Sleep. First rubdown of the day.
6:15 am: Lead yoga class (I am well-known for my downward dog).
6:45 am: Walk my humans. Dictate memo to Bill Gates.
7 am: Refreshing drink of filtered water. Light breakfast of organic, free-range dog kibble.
7:30 am: Humans finally vacate my living space. Settle down for a Power Nap in air-conditioned bliss.
10 am: Work on novel.
1 pm: Lunch with Hillary Clinton, Oprah, The Dalai Lama, and Bono.
2:30 pm: Chess tournament.
4 pm: Watch Oprah's show while I work on my paintings.
5 pm: The first human arrives home. Walk her, then return home for milkbone smoothie and rubdown.
6 pm: Conference call on my plan for peace in the Middle East.
7 pm: Instruct human on dinner preparation as I lie on rug and growl at Frederick.
8 pm: Power nap.
9 pm: Moonlight meditation walk.
10 pm: Time for my Beauty Sleep!
Kisses,
Fanny
6 am: Awaken from Beauty Sleep. First rubdown of the day.
6:15 am: Lead yoga class (I am well-known for my downward dog).
6:45 am: Walk my humans. Dictate memo to Bill Gates.
7 am: Refreshing drink of filtered water. Light breakfast of organic, free-range dog kibble.
7:30 am: Humans finally vacate my living space. Settle down for a Power Nap in air-conditioned bliss.
10 am: Work on novel.
1 pm: Lunch with Hillary Clinton, Oprah, The Dalai Lama, and Bono.
2:30 pm: Chess tournament.
4 pm: Watch Oprah's show while I work on my paintings.
5 pm: The first human arrives home. Walk her, then return home for milkbone smoothie and rubdown.
6 pm: Conference call on my plan for peace in the Middle East.
7 pm: Instruct human on dinner preparation as I lie on rug and growl at Frederick.
8 pm: Power nap.
9 pm: Moonlight meditation walk.
10 pm: Time for my Beauty Sleep!
Kisses,
Fanny
Thursday, July 26, 2007
A Day in the Life of Fred
Are you aware of the busy life Fred leads? Let me take you into just one day so you can see how action-packed my schedule can be.
6 am: My Mommies wake up. Fred rolls over, thinks about milkbones and butterflies.
6:30 am: Walk with Mommy and Fanny. Circle and circle and...oh, a bee! Now, what was I doing? I forgot.
Why is Fanny annoyed with me?
7-7:30 am: Drink water. Eat some organic dog food.
7:30 am: Mommies leave for work. Fred hops on bed and naps.
7:30 am-3 pm: Naptime, with occasional water breaks. Wonder when, or if, Mommies will come home.
3:00-5 pm: Fred moves to the living room to watch General Hospital and Oprah. Fred tries to lay on comfy rug. Fanny growls.
5:00 pm: Lizo home! Jump up and down like a dancing bear.
5:15 pm: Walk with Lizo. Visit Willow, the neighboring cairn terrier. Lizo sings to Fred, which helps "move things along."
5:45 pm: Whew, that walk was exhausting! Drink some water, eat some kibble, sleep.
7 pm: It's hamburger night!
7:30-10pm: Nap.
10 pm: Cuddle time with Mama Lizo and bedtime.
What a day!
6 am: My Mommies wake up. Fred rolls over, thinks about milkbones and butterflies.
6:30 am: Walk with Mommy and Fanny. Circle and circle and...oh, a bee! Now, what was I doing? I forgot.
Why is Fanny annoyed with me?
7-7:30 am: Drink water. Eat some organic dog food.
7:30 am: Mommies leave for work. Fred hops on bed and naps.
7:30 am-3 pm: Naptime, with occasional water breaks. Wonder when, or if, Mommies will come home.
3:00-5 pm: Fred moves to the living room to watch General Hospital and Oprah. Fred tries to lay on comfy rug. Fanny growls.
5:00 pm: Lizo home! Jump up and down like a dancing bear.
5:15 pm: Walk with Lizo. Visit Willow, the neighboring cairn terrier. Lizo sings to Fred, which helps "move things along."
5:45 pm: Whew, that walk was exhausting! Drink some water, eat some kibble, sleep.
7 pm: It's hamburger night!
7:30-10pm: Nap.
10 pm: Cuddle time with Mama Lizo and bedtime.
What a day!
Friday, July 20, 2007
Fred is out of sorts
I am having a lot of trouble adjusting to Mommy's new work schedule. I was feeling secure having her home most of the time, and now she leaves in the morning and I don't know if I'll ever see her again.I think Fanny is feeling it, too. Neither of us has been eating during the day. First off, speaking for myself, I'm a little depressed without Mommy around. Also, who knows when she'll be back to fill up the food bowl with our special organic food, pour some filtered water into Fred's tureen, and sing to me?
Mama Lizo tried to spiff up the living room for us and make us more comfortable during the day by adding a cheerful rug to our living space (picture of cheerful rug is above right). Fanny and I do like it - so much so that we've been arguing over it. Fanny lies down on it, spreads herself out, and growls at me. What's a gentle hound to do?
Sigh,
Fred
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