Wear Your Lifejacket or DIE

Momma Lizo's little niece created the poster seen above as part of a Safe Boating contest. In case you're having trouble reading it, the text reads "Please boat safety your kids might die. Wear your life jacket."

Happy Memorial Day Weekend From Fred

Ah, Memorial Day! Time to kick back, beg for hot dogs, and just be Fred.

I'm not sure what my mommies are planning for the weekend, though I heard a rumor that fireworks may be involved. Fred is quite scared of fireworks. They make big noises that hurt Fred's floppy ears! For that matter, Fred is scared of thunderstorms, cats, garbage cans, umbrellas, the downstairs neighbors, and Fred's own shadow.

I think I need to go cower in a corner now.

Best,

Fred

New Food for Fred

My mommies bought me a new kind of food. It is supposed to help with my allergies. It's yummy!

Yes, Fred is a Natural Choice kind of boy.

Now, if I could just get them to take me to get groomed.

Let My Freddy Go!

Dear Faithful Readers,

This post is being relayed by Fred via me. He says that his Mama Carol has disciplined him about his recent posts. Specifically, Mama Carol was annoyed by the posts suggesting that 1) she cannot cook and 2) she should cook for Fred.

Mama Carol has told Fred not to blog anymore until he apologizes for his uncomplementary remarks about the woman who "picks up his poo, cleans his ears, and always keeps the water bowl full."

On my part, I must echo our Freddy's assertion that Carol cannot cook. Trust me. If I didn't cook or otherwise procure food for her, the woman would eat Chinese take-out for every meal.

In any case, Fred would like you and his Mama to know that he is most grievously sorry and he did not mean to offend anyone.

As ever,

Lizo

Hint Hint, Mama Carol

The Poop Pantry

http://www.thepoop.com/pooppantry/

Kurt Vonnegut's Daughter's Dog....

has his own page on MySpace.

I'm sure he's very upset about his grandfather's passing.

Pet Food Recall

It makes Fred scared to eat!

http://www.fda.gov/oc/opacom/hottopics/petfood.html

(Did you know that Fred knows how to create a hyperlink?)

Fred Doesn't Want to Get Lost

Chip us, Mama Carol!
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Lost Dog Found Four Years Later, 1,100 Miles From Home


LEE'S SUMMIT, Missouri (AP) -- A Boston terrier named Mickey who disappeared four years ago from his suburban Kansas City backyard was found in Montana and reunited with his owners this week.


Cher Jarosz and her daughter Kari Mitchell thought they had lost Mickey forever -- until they received a call from an animal shelter last week 1,100 miles away in Billings, Montana.
A microchip on Mickey helped the Billings Animal Shelter return him. (Watch Mickey's happy homecoming )


"Some lady from the public walked in the back door," said Kristal Ward, office manager at the shelter. "She found the dog running up the street. She tossed him to me, and that's how it started."


Ward said she called Avid, a company that makes microchip identification systems, and was given the name of a veterinary clinic in Lee's Summit, Missouri.


"I called that vet clinic because they were the one that should have a record of that chip," Ward said. "I gave them the chip number, and the woman kind of started screaming.


"She goes, 'Oh my God, is that a Boston terrier? Oh my God, it belongs to Kari Mitchell. She used to work here."'


Ward called Mitchell and confirmed that the dog was Mickey, she said.


After she talked to Mitchell, "Her mother called, and they were just beside themselves," Ward said.


The family said he looks different and doesn't remember his name. His teeth show signs of wear and tear.


Only Mickey knows how he wound up in Montana, and that's fine by Mitchell.


"We're happy to have him home," she told KSHB-TV in Kansas City after Mickey caught a flight home. "I just hope whoever was taking care of him, I hope they were just glad he's home."

Fred is Being Harassed

Fred does not mean this to be a Poison Fred letter, but our new downstairs neighbors are putting Fred over the edge. They have said that Fanny and I make too much noise when we walk (they say "run") through the apartment! Can you believe this? They did not even bother to speak with me and Fanny about this - they just called the landlord. how do they even know it's us? Maybe it's the noise of Mama Lizo walking through the apartment in her annoying high heels. Maybe it's the sound of Mama Carol crunching on her stupid ice cubes.

Ironically, one of our downstairs neighbors is a drummer. He drums everyday and does Fred complain about this? Noooo, he does not.

Did you know that Fred is part Russian?

Here I am in my groovy Russian hat. I'm telling you, my mommies should get me an agent.

влюбленность,

Fredsky

Fred Also Likes to Sleep

Fred Likes to Read

Caleigh took this picture of me the other evening in the drawing room, as I was perusing one of my favorite volumes by the fire in my smoking jacket.

It's the Most Wonderful Time of the Year!

Time for the Westminster Kennel Club Dog Show, that is.

Westminster Kennel Club

I watched a bit last night. Did you know that Bill Cosby's Dandy Dinmont Terrier, Harry (also known as Ch. Hobergays Fineus Fogg), won the terrier group?

Fred Enjoys a Good Book

I see that one of the libraries in Nassau is offering kids ages 5-8 the opportunity to read to a dog on Valentine's Day. I love being read to - especially Clifford books - and I think this is a great idea. Do you think they would let me crash their party?

Love,

Encyclofredia Brown

Fred is Clean

I'm bright and sparkly and sweet-smelling after my recent trip to Unleashed Pet Boutique and Spa in Port Washington. Fanny and I really enjoyed our baths, and they have really cute clothes. They even have clothes in Fred-sizes.

Excuse me while I go check myself out in the mirror. I am such a handsome boy.

With love,

Fred

Everybody's a Critic

Mama Lizo produced a lovely family calendar this year. Fanny was selected as the cover girl and I was awarded the coveted title of Miss January. Mama tried to include as many family members as possible in the calendar, but still received this message from an irate family member:

Dear Lpizo(sorry about the typo, it's hard to type with paws)

I am quite distressed that photos of your two mangy mutts made the final cut to your 2007 calendar, yet I - a cocker spaniel of pure breed stock - was omitted, only to receive a consolation prize of my birthday printed in your September section. Was this an oversight?, as I cannot imagine how I (pictured above) could not be included! Just look at my features!! Finely pointed snout, perfectly symmetrical tongue, and I can drive!!

Thank you.

Jackson Domino Olesh

From The New York Times - How Cute is This?

December 22, 2006
Huggable by Children: Replicas of Dogs That Searched 9/11 Ruins

By DAVID W. DUNLAP

Shoppers on the lookout for something new, unusual and uniquely New York will find plush 9/11 search-and-rescue puppies on sale opposite ground zero.

Yes, it is a child’s version of the dogs that were taken to the ruins of the World Trade Center after Sept. 11, 2001, to search for survivors. And human remains.

The 8-inch-tall doe-eyed puppies, which cost $11.95, wear blue T-shirts with two offset squares symbolizing the voids left by the twin towers. That logo — in essence, the World Trade Center brand — also appears on human-size T-shirts, polo shirts, baseball caps and coffee mugs for sale in the Tribute Center at 120 Liberty Street. The proceeds help pay the center’s operating costs.

The private, nonprofit Tribute Center, which opened in September, is the first and only visitors’ center at ground zero. With evocative galleries and guided tours, it stresses “person to person history.”

Or, in the case of the stuffed animals, “puppy to person history.”

Lynn Tierney, the president of the center, witnessed those desperate days after the attack firsthand as a deputy fire commissioner. She makes no apology for casting them in terms a child might understand.

“Those of us who were there understand the impact that the presence of these dogs had,” she said. “Their job is noble and necessary. Their handlers are extraordinary people. This is a way of paying tribute to them.”

The center’s twin-footprint logo was designed, pro bono, by Peter Arnell, the chairman and chief creative officer of the Arnell Group, a marketing company. He said it satisfied the visitors who wished to commemorate their trip to ground zero, and also promoted the center.

“We’re trying to bring a lot of good and honorable attention to something we believe everyone should go visit,” Mr. Arnell said, “because it’s a piece of a very well-thought-through representation of this horrible tragedy.”

About 1,000 people visit the center daily, Ms. Tierney said, and closer to 2,000 a day on weekends. Because of the disturbing nature of some displays, the center does not recommend taking young children.

“Grandparents and parents would come up to us afterwards,” she said, “and say: ‘We’re so moved. Is there anything here that would help me start a dialogue with my children or grandchildren about 9/11?’ ”

The puppies were a response to that demand, she said, and arrived about two weeks ago. “They’re really popular,” Ms. Tierney said. “People recognize immediately that we’re paying homage to a critical part of the story.”

In fact, she said, her 7-year-old niece in Sturbridge, Mass., is getting a puppy for Christmas. (Publishing this information, she added, would not spoil the girl’s surprise because she did not read The New York Times.)

Fred Wishes You a Happy Holiday Season

Peace on earth, good Fred to all!

One Family, One Pup

This comes to us courtesy of the Associated Press and CNN. Fred is very upset - this brings out the puppy activist in him.

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BEIJING, China (AP) -- First it was one child. Now authorities say Beijing families will be allowed only one dog.

The restriction is part of efforts to stamp out rabies, state media said. It follows a campaign in August in which thousands of dogs were killed in order to fight the disease.

China's capital will institute a "one dog" policy for each household in nine areas, the official Xinhua News Agency said Wednesday.

"Only one pet dog is allowed per household in the zones, and dangerous and large dogs will be banned. Anyone keeping an unlicensed dog will face prosecution," Xinhua said.

It said rabies killed 318 people nationwide in September.

Rabies is on the rise in China, with 2,651 reported deaths from the disease in 2004, the last year for which data were available.

Only 3 percent of China's dogs are vaccinated against rabies, which attacks the nervous system and can be fatal.

China has limited most urban couples to one child and those in the countryside to two since the 1970s in an effort to limit population growth and ease the strain on resources.

The dog limit was announced by Beijing police and the city agencies for agriculture and commerce, Xinhua said.

A notice on the police department's Web site did not refer to a "one dog" policy but said a clampdown on stray and large dogs would be implemented.

It called on dog owners to "create a harmonious society and be a civilized dog raiser."

Harmonious society is the term for President Hu Jintao's campaign to share the gains of China's rapid economic growth more fairly across all levels of society.

Authorities prompted an outcry in July and August when they launched several mass-slaughters of dogs to curb outbreaks of rabies.

In one county in the southwestern province of Yunnan where three people had died of rabies, authorities killed 50,000 dogs, many of them beaten to death in front of their owners.

Many people also supported the move, saying it was the only way to contain the disease.

Fred is Bald

Mama Lizo, see what happens when you're not home? How is Fred supposed to go outside like this? I'll have to wait for the spring thaw.

Donations of hats and little fleecy sweaters would be appreciated.